(corresponding from the cornfields of Iowa)
It’s been said that there exists a road paved with good intentions. Whose idea was that? Asphalt or concrete would’ve been a better choice. When building a road, you want to construct it to last. Maintenance is time consuming, expensive, and it slows down traffic. Good intentions are only suited for temporary structures, not for a long-lasting thoroughfare.
This week’s Torah portion talks about this road. "Who is the man who has built a house…planted a vineyard…been engaged to be married? Lest they get killed in the upcoming war and be unable to bring these beginnings to fruition, they shall not fight with the nation." Apparently, the intention to see these beginnings through is not good enough, the Torah is telling us that reaching our individual goals is just as important.
Our Rabbis teach us that "Osek b’mitzvah, patur b’mitzvah," If you’re in the middle of doing a mitzvah, don’t abandon it to become involved in another one. But in our parsha, it seems that a mitzvah that affects the entire nation (fighting in the war) would certainly take precedence over a mitzvah that only affected one family. Right? A chavrusa of mine helped me understand the contradiction in this question.
I’ve paved quite a few roads with good intentions: there’s a whole stretch of road going towards mastering Hebrew, an expressway over to volunteering time with children, and an eight lane highway staring me in the face each time I see that pile of egg shells and carrot peels that needs to be composted at the Yeshiva. We all start projects with the intention of finishing them, but the path to fruition is fraught with obstacles: fear of success, fear of commitment, fear of putting in hard work that might not pay off. G-d gives us the miracle of inspiration at the beginning of an endeavor, but it’s up to us to recreate that miracle as soon as that initial burst of motivation starts to fade.
Completion, "shalem," brings about peace, "shalom." So a mitzvah that is completed as an individual, or as a family, sends out incredible spiritual shock waves to heal the world and pave the road to peace. Laying a foundation to a house is hardly inspiring to others thinking of creating a family, but seeing a HOME lit with Shabbat candles on Friday night blows me away every time. Meeting a couple who just got engaged is a beautiful thing, but dancing at their wedding and feeling the incredible joy and light they’re exuding on that day...GEVALT!
Elul is upon us, the month before the new year…the new life we’re about to pave. It’s a month to prepare, to work toward goals with feverish intensity. Don’t underestimate your power to heal the world when you create "shalem." We all need to fight in the battle for peace with our brothers and sisters, but not until we can join the troops with the stability of home in our soul, the sweetness of grapes on our lips, and a love for the giver of life in our heart.